Mason Turns 9!

Mason's 9th Birthday was yesterday!

I think that I had a great day.

We gave him the last two Hidden Side Lego sets that we had stashed in our closet, a watch (that Jon bought on clearance), and a unicycle!  He was a very happy boy.  When I woke up early to exercise, he was already wandering around the house in a pikachu hat, ha ha.  I told him that he had to at least wait until 6:30 to open up his gifts.

I made him bacon, eggs, and chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast.  The rest of the day he played with his legos and practiced his unicycle.  For dinner, Jon's parents and Darlene's family came over.  Mason chose the menu.  We ate chicken tortellini soup, homemade bread sticks, and salad.  I made him a pokeball cake.  The cake was so good!

Grandma gave him another Hidden Side lego set and Darlene gave him a pokemon lego set.  I think that he is set for years with the amount of lego sets that he has received recently.

Pictures of Mason's big day!

Mason's party was originally supposed to be on Friday, but our power unexpectedly went out.  It was out from about 1 in the afternoon until midnight.  I decorated in the dark and the kids all had a sleepover in the family room.  We went out to eat at El Pollo Loco.  It was an adventure!

I died laughing when Jon lit this kerosene lamp.  He wanted to light this lamp to take place of the battery operated flashlight that we were using.  I think he thought that it would be a lot brighter...it was barely lighter than a candle.  It doesn't sound funny as I'm writing this, but I couldn't stop laughing about it.  There was no way that this little lamp could have replaced the battery flashlight.

This is Mason's 4th Poke-ball cake that I have made him.  This was the best version, by far, in my opinion.  It looked and tasted amazing!

Lizzie made the kids homemade pokeman shirts.  I failed to get a picture of Bryce's or Caitlyn's.  Oops!

I made these giant marshmallow poke-ball pops.

The Pokemon theme sure does lend to some fun creative snack ideas!

These have been in the goodie-bags for the past 4 pokeman parties.  So easy and cute!

Jon finished the laundry room!  It looks amazing!  I don't have to feel embarrassed when the laundry room door is left open, ha ha.

 Today was a busy day.

Ward council at 9, sacrament meeting at 10:30, texting people and making an agenda, taking care of kids, young women presidency meeting at 2, etc.

I felt better about these meetings, although I still feel guilty and like I made mistakes and that I wish I hadn't have said certain things.  It's just my anxiety.  I overthink things.

I just need to ask for forgiveness and move on.  That's all that I can do.

Today on facebook one of my childhood friends tagged me in some pictures taken in middle school.  Oh my goodness, my stomach dropped to my feet.  Those were my worst days.  I did not want to be reminded of those days and I did not want anyone else to observe what I was like in those days, ha ha.  I promptly untagged myself and hoped that not too many people saw.

I realized that I don't have that great of self-confidence.  If I did, those pictures wouldn't have bothered me so much.  I do know and appreciate the fact that I am not that awkward middle-schooler any longer.  I have moved on.  I have changed.  I am better now than I was at that point in time.  But that doesn't mean that I want to remember those days.

I am grateful for how far I have come in life.  I am grateful for the ability that we all have to change.

I'm grateful for the here and now.  For who I am today.

Honestly, if I could go back in time I would tell myself to stop trying to impress everyone and just be yourself.  I have been praying for that ability lately.  For the ability to just be myself and be happy with myself, exactly as I am.

If I could go back in time I would probably not have wasted money being in a friend picture with friends who I really don't think cared about me at all.  As soon as I hit high school that fact was apparent.  All of those days when I sat in awkwardness at the lunch table wanting to be seen or heard...and feeling completely ignored and all alone.  This is one of the reasons I look for the loner...because I felt as if I was one, even in the midst of a crowded lunch room.

Tough memories.  I'm going to bed, ha ha.