I Missed Sunday! Today is Monday!
Sorry, I was so busy on Sunday that I missed doing our usual "Sunday Scripts". I felt bad about it...but it's okay. I'll just continue the tradition next Sunday. Yesterday we had our regular church at home, we did virtual primary singing time, and then the ward had it's 2nd virtual ward devotional. I was asked to share a scripture and a few thoughts at the beginning of the meeting. I hope that I did okay...it's nerve-wracking speaking in front of people, especially on the computer, ha ha. After church, the girls and I went to Jon's parents house to help them pack up their kitchen. Then they came over to our house for dinner.
It looks as if things are going smoothly with their move. They will be moving in with us on October 13th. Their new house closes escrow on October 31st. Then they will continue to live with us while they fix up their house before moving in. Heavenly Father has truly blessed us all with this transaction. I know that He is aware of us and that He loves us...even though what we are asking for seems so insignificant and superficial in comparison to the real troubles that so many people throughout the world are experiencing. I feel guilty praying and asking for such trivial things. I hope that I can be forgiven.
I received a very sad and emotionally disturbing email from Nana Duncan last night. It broke my heart. She experienced a stroke in July. I knew that she was suffering from some repercussions of the stroke, but I had no idea how severe the adverse affects of the stroke were. She told me that her left arm does not work. That the stroke caused two of her molars on the left side to become dead and had to be removed. Her left eye had developed wet macular degeneration. The left side of her head is numb. Her left ear is deaf. The left side of her neck and part of her face is numb. In her words, "Your Nana is a numbskull".
Isn't that absolutely heartbreaking? I could barely stand to read it. I was upset this morning thinking about it. I want to visit her so badly but the borders are closed due to the pandemic. I have no idea when I will be able to visit her again. Tara and Alyssa and I would like to all go together and visit them. I hate to say it, but perhaps for one last time before they pass away. It breaks my heart. I have always felt close to Nana and Grandpa Duncan, but since Mom has died, she has become one of my very best friends. I love her dearly and I don't know what I'm going to do when she isn't here on Earth any longer. And I'm jealous that she will be able to be with my Mom...how I miss her. I wish that she were here. I wish that she could be here to see me raise my children. I wish that I could talk to her. She was always so wise. She had the best advice about everything...and then she was gone. I was never able to talk to her while I folded laundry again. I was never able to call her and have her tell me to "Kiss the Babies for me" ever again. Why?! Other people get to have their Mom's as adults. They get to go out to lunch with their Mom's. They get to be in a position to take care of their Mom's as they grow older. I never had that opportunity. And I feel bad that I didn't appreciate my Mom enough when I had her here with me. Once they are gone...they are gone. Temporarily, that is. I know that she still exists...but not in this realm. Not in this realm, where I need her to be. But Heavenly Father needs her elsewhere...I know she is doing exactly what she is meant to be doing at this exact time in her eternal progression.
When Dad first got married to Lisa, I had a very hard time with it. But I will never forget the day that I was sitting in my hallway folding laundry (fitting, since I often talked to my Mom while folding laundry) and I felt a very strong impression that my Mom was okay with Dad marrying Lisa. I felt like Mom is happy for Dad and that I should be happy for him too. And that I should embrace the change and go with it. That the change was exactly as it was supposed to be. I felt the spirit strongly...I felt like Mom was there with me in the hallway that day, giving me permission to accept the changes in my life. I immediately sat down and wrote Lisa a mother's day card and apologized for not being accepting of her at the beginning and that I was now going to be "All In" and treat her with the love and kindness that she deserved. And our relationship has been fine ever since. At the beginning, I couldn't refer to Lisa as "Grandma". I had a very difficult time saying it...but now I tell the kids to "Go To Grandma (Lisa)" and it feels natural. It's all okay. Mom is okay with it all.
But I still miss her. I always will.
Anyway, a few pictures from today!
Mason made a skeleton with the Cheetos skeleton shaped chips that Daddy bought!
I kept getting further and further away...but he eventually followed me.
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